Sayang Alya.....

Rindu giler kat budak manja, masam, & comel ni... makin besar, makin makin byk kerenah.. sometimes boleh menggelakkan ktrg & sometimes mampu menggelegakkan ati ktrg....huhu. tp adatlah, setiap ibu bapa mesti melalui saat2 ni.. depends pada ibu bapa tu sendirik jer macamana nak handle anak masing2...

Roti Gardenia

aritu pas keje singgah la kedai jap nak beli roti. so, aku bagi alya kat hasben nak soh pegang kan & aku turun kete pi kedai... first time ni masuk kedai tu sbnarnye after kedai tu dah ditukar milik ke owner baru. design pon lain dr dulu.

so, tempat yang aku tuju after masuk situ mestilah kat depan2 kedai kan memandangkan aku nak beli roti je pon.. tp agak hampa bile rak roti tu pon x nampak bayang... Ok, xpe xpe, teruskan usaha lagi & aku carik plak smapai ke dalam2 kedai. kali ni tempat aku tuju adalah ke rak2 makanan plak.. tp still gak x jumpe...

so, bile dah x jumpa gak, barula aku pergi kat salah sorang pekerja dia nak tanye pasal roti tu.

Pencarik yang x jumpe2 : Dik, roti kat mane ek?
Penjual yg konfident: Ade kak, kat row ujung tu pastu ade kat belakang2..

(sambil2 ni aku dah jeling2 gak kat row ujung tu, tp cam suspicious lak tmpat tu)

Pencarik yang x jumpe2: Kat sini? (sambil nak masuk kat bhg tuh)
Penjual yang konfident: Aah kak, kat belakang2 ek..

Tapi, jeng2.. aku dah hagak dah, mesti budak laki tu paham bende lain bile aku cakap nak beli roti.. Ade ke patut, dia bagi direction ke area Pads.. huhu... masa sampai kat situ, aku tak tau nak gelak ke atau nak nangis..rasanye macam dah jelas kot tujuan aku just "nak carik roti'..

Pencarik yang x jumpe2: Dik, bukan roti tu la, roti gardenia ade jual x?
Penjual yang konfident : (muka malu2) ehehehe...oo, roti tu xde jual kak..hehehe


SEKIAN....  >_<
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Cerita rawak

Alhamdulillah, besok umat islam akan mula berpuasa di bulan Ramadhan. Time ni kandungan aku dah pon mencecah 4 bulan setengah & hopefully aku akan mampu utk completekan misi puasa penuh utk kali ni memandangkan first trimester yang penuh liku & ranjau dah pon berlalu...hehe. First ramadhan utk kali ni disambut dgn hasben & anak jer. Insyallah next week or next 2 week barulah ktrg akan balik menyambut bulan puasa dgn famili kat melaka.

Alya buat masa skg dah  berusia 1 tahun 3 bln ++ ketika & saat ni. Sgt progressing well & dah boleh accept formula milk after bertarung selama sebulan lebih nak mengajar minum susu formula. 1 pencapaian yang agak mengujakan bagi aku & hasben even ramai yang ckp, formula milk ni bukan la satu keperluan pon tp still aku rasa x lengkap utk perkembangan dia memandangkan aku dah x bekalkan pon EBM kat dia since dia berusia setaun setengah. Tp, syukur sangat sbb susu aku tak la terus xde wat masa ni. Masih lagi ada walaupun x semeriah dulu & keterujaan alya pada original milk ni pon masih blom surut..hehehe...

senang ati tgk TV sambil berbantalkan patung kesayangan..

sambil membaca sambil membebel

Budak bertuah tu jgk dah semakinnnn manja ngn ayah dia skg ni. kemain tau kekadang tu dia tanak pon ngn aku.. huhu. eskyen sgt..  tp bile dah ngantuk barula dia akan dtg balik merayu2 kat aku nak soh tidokan dia.. itupon sbb dia masih lagi ketagihan utk menyoyot sambil terlena. saboo je la..  wakto tido alya alhamdulillah sgt teratur. setiap hari sebelum pukul 10mlm dah pon terlelap & dia akan bangun semula dalam kul 7 atau 8 pg. Tp dr kol 10mlm hingga 8 pg, still dia akan bangun 2 atau 3 kali utk menyusu & menyoyot ataupon ade gak dia akan terlenaaa smapai la ke pagi.. yeay!!! I suka! I suka!....

Alya jgk dah makin boleh diharap. Kalau kt nak mintak tolong dia amikkan sesuatu tu, mesti dia akan tolong. hehe.. dah boleh sebut ayah dgn jelas, tp masih lagi x boleh sebut IBU.. geram, geram.. selalu tau dia akan sebut mama..mama.. Mama tu merujuk pada babysitter dia la. even dah berkali2 aku bahasakan Ibu, still dia akan sebut mama.. huhu...

Ade 1 crita yang klaka sgt pasal alya. tatau nape alya takut sgt kat vacum cleaner umah ktrg. kekadang tu sampai nangis2 bile tgk benda alah tu ade dekat2 dgn dia..kalau dia x nangis, 1 tabiat dia bile dia x suka sesuatu tu dia akan goyang goyangkan badan dia macam reaksi org geli geleman tu..hehehe so, bile dah takut cmtu, ktrg pon amik kesempatan la jgk. memandangkan dia ni suka sgt memunggah barang2 dapo & masuk dapo time ktrg masak, apa yang ktrg buat adalah letakkan vacum tu betul2 kat tempat memasak & rak2 dapur..hehe...

mainan yang bakal di recycle oleh adiknyer..ahaks  ^_^

Okla, ni je la crita buat masa ni.. ade lagi 1 crita best yang aku nak catatkan lagi next2 time. Masanyer blom tiba & insyaallah bakal tiba x lama lg.

cerita yang sedey...

terbaca 1 citer ni, terus wat bergenang air mata.. nasib baik orang sebelah aku x perasan perasaan sayu aku skgn ni..hehe


When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew.
When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.


She requested that everyday for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Dew about my wife’s divorce conditions… She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.


My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.


On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time.. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.


On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.


She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.


Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.


But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy.


I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind… I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.


She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until deaths do us apart.


Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.


At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.


That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.